ENQUIRIES FROM THE MEDIA ONLY
If you are not from the media please move onto the section headed. “ALL other correspondence” Helen Dewdney, The Complaining Cow is represented by Cloud9management. For enquiries from the media please email firstname.lastname@example.org or ring 0207 637 2903. (Local BBC stations, media wanting a quote for articles and similar, please contact Helen directly at Helen@thecomplainingcow.co.uk). Any query about advertising, sponsored posts and the like you are NOT from the media and you will be ignored and blocked, whatever email address you use.
Emails relating to any issues regarding consumer rights or the website sent to Cloud9management will not be read or answered.
ALL OTHER CORRESPONDENCE
Please read this page below BEFORE emailing me or it is possible that I will not respond. (I am a great advocate of good manners so I do not like to ignore emails but I do expect good manners from other people too!!)
Some people email me the same email to more than one email address! Please don’t be so ridiculous! Read the below and you will know the appropriate one to use!
The Complaining Cow offers various services for consumers and business and details can be found here.
Consultancy@thecomplainingcow.co.uk for services. Please note that services are charged for.
INFORMATION AND COMPLAINT/CONSUMER RIGHTS QUERIES
Please, only send me an email with no more than one short paragraph if you are asking for my advice regarding a complaint and make sure you read this section and “Manners” and “Finding the information for yourself”! As I am sure you will appreciate, I am unable to read through masses of emails every day and advise. I am having to reduce the time I spend on this as I do not have the resources to help everyone who contacts me for free. If you would like to increase the chances of a response, read and take note of the contents of this page as most people don’t! I am far more likely to want to help someone who has spent a little of their own time on the blog rather than expecting me to do all the work for them!
If you really think that your answer cannot be found on the website or in the book then please email me briefly. (One short paragraph and the links to relevant posts which have not covered your issue).
If you still feel that you need me to help you other than providing an answer to a short query (the answer to which you can’t find on the blog) and How To Complain: The Essential Guide to Getting Refunds, Redress and Results! doesn’t help, then please see Services above.
If I have helped you, please consider showing your appreciation by sharing relevant posts on social media.
Attachments will not be read.
Please also note that I am unable to provide telephone help under any circumstances.
FINDING THE INFORMATION FOR YOURSELF
You can also use the search box on the site and put in a couple of different words related to your complaint a few times as you may find the help you need in a post, such as “Holiday”, “Purchasing online”, “Banks”, “communications” “mobile” “flight”, “Car”, “contracts” “faulty” etc. If for example you have problems with the supply of a bathroom, look up similar things (as they are when it comes to goods and services!) such as “Kitchen” or “Bedroom”. You will find a post that probably outlines everything you need and will probably give you more details than I can in an email. Your complaint is highly likely to be covered by a post and if so I will only send you a link to it. So please research the site first, you may find it actually saves you time and I will be grateful not having to do the search because you are too lazy to do so! I will be more likely to give you help (additional to that already in the post(s)) if you tell me the pages you have looked at that apparently don’t give you the information you need. If I send you links in response to your email that you haven’t looked at then it is because I’m feeling kind and generous in spending the time which you couldn’t be bothered to do! And trust me, I won’t be happy about it!
email@example.com for general enquiries and requests for advice but please ensure you have read all of this post BEFORE emailing me. I will not reply if it is clear you have not read “Information and complaint queries” or “MANNERS “.
You can also look at the Top 20 Tips for how to complain effectively and more tips on my YouTube channel. You can subscribe to this channel to get updates. Anything longer than a short paragraph will not get read as I just do not have the time as I am sure you will appreciate! It probably also means that either you haven’t looked through the website or you need my services. Oh and if you don’t say “Please” when asking for help then I’m very likely to ignore your email! I particularly like the people who are very well mannered and say “Thank you” like my Facebook page and tweet out the website before emailing me 🙂 It still amazes me, that people on Twitter, ask for my advice on there and here without even a ” please” or a follow!
I do find some emails very rude, those that refer to me as “Sir” or “Sir/Madam” or “www.thecomplainingcow.co.uk” or “To whom it may concern”! Or “Hi” clearly a generic email. All used more than once. It just shows that you haven’t even bothered to look at anything on the website or even a quick google search! Not even to find my name, (and yes my name IS on here, in many posts) yet you want my free help! I am very unlikely to respond to these emails. If I have aren’t you lucky when you were so rude?!
As the number of requests increases and it becomes even more difficult to reply to everyone, the first people not to get help will be the people who can’t use the words “please” and “thank you.” It’s quite nice if you have found my help useful to come back and say “thank you” and let me know it got you redress too You should also of course buy the book!
WANT TO WORK WITH THE COMPLAINING COW?
Great. If it is a mutual partnership where we both gain, then contact me. However, if you are a business please make sure you know the difference between “your” “you’re” and “you are”, or “their” “there” and “they’re” because sorry and all that, but I can’t help businesses improve when their standard of English is poor, you don’t recognise it and don’t ask people to help you. Poor business model – perhaps I can help you with that?! (I can forgive typos but there is a limit! ;))
Please also have the courtesy of looking through the site before contacting me so you don’t waste yours or my time.
Guest blog posts are not working with The Complaining Cow, please see “Guest blog and inclusion requests” below.
If you truly do have something different to offer, tell me about it in a short paragraph in an email.
I do not take sponsored posts of any description. Offer me an “opportunity” or anything like it, you get blocked.
As I am sure you will appreciate, I get inundated for requests for help etc. Hence my request for keeping things short when emailing me. Email is my preferred point of contact. I do not undertake video calls with people I have never met for time and safety reasons. Sorry, I am sure decent people who would be no problem understand this but I don’t know if you do or don’t so it has to be a no no.
GUEST BLOG, LINKS AND INCLUSION REQUESTS
Guest posts are Strictly invite only. Please do not request to do a guest blog post on my site. Your email will be marked as junk and deleted. I do not take paid for posts or paid links either. If you email me saying that you want to write a blog post paying me or otherwise for your company or on behalf of a client you will be blocked. Reasons two fold – one you haven’t bothered to read and/or understand this paragraph and two you are rude. The worst are the generic “I love your site” types and then bang on about something wholly irrelevant to the site. Or those who say they can write about anything.
I do not respond to unsolicited emails requesting that I include infographics and links to sites, paid or otherwise etc. You will be blocked.
Contacting CEOs – I do NOT have contact details for CEOS. Please see CEOemail.com to get a CEO’s contact details.
Please do not openly or blind copy me into emails to companies. I will not read or do anything with them and I see enough without being cc’d! Also it won’t make the slightest difference to a company who you copy in. Thanks. Same with tweets really too. I’d advise you don’t do this with other journalists/companies as they will not pick anything up either. It’s actually quite rude expecting someone to pick up your story without you having even bothering to contact them first, another reason why this tactic never works. And if you do contact them make sure you read all of their contact pages regarding what people can and can’t answer!
Please please please do not email complaints that are “just for my information” or “for my interest” or anything about bad service experienced and how companies dealt with your issue! Or stories of your complaint successes or failures. Thousands of complaints are sent to companies every day. I’m sorry I do not have the time to read them and will do nothing with them at all. Please put what you were going to email me in a comment on a relevant blog post as I do read all comments on the blog and respond to most. I am more than happy for you to share the information in this more appropriate way. Thanks.
Please do not send me stories because you think yours is a little different, or you think I will find it more interesting than anyone else’s. You have more chance of winning the Lottery than of your complaint being unique in nature and I am unable to read them. Your email will NOT be read. Please respect this and understand when you do not get a reply.
SEO AND MARKETING COMPANIES ETC
All emails from you will be forwarded to the ICO for breaching GDPR from the 25th May 2018. I do not consent to any of your emails and you did not email me personally.
Please note I will not respond to any queries regarding unsolicited goods. All the information you need is in the relevant post.
Please note I only cover consumer rights. For example if you have been accused of theft, or you want to accuse a staff member of anything other than poor service, e.g. physically hurting you or stealing then these are criminal allegations with which I cannot help, sorry. I advise you to contact Citizen’s Advice Bureau. Another example, employment issues, again, please seek help from CAB and also look up ACAS website for lots of information.
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